The hair tips, advice and recommendations given on this blog are given based on the experiences of the authors. These tips may not work for everyone and every hair type and it is important to acknowledge this since we are neither hair specialists nor trichologists.

Also many pictures on this blog belong to the authors but there are others that we do not have ownership for and thus we do not claim ownership of the ones that do not belong to us.

Monday, October 5, 2009

I’m frustrated! Why isn’t natural hair working for me?

I hear these words all the time:

 "I’m frustrated and I want to get a perm." 

"I can never get my hair to look nice." 

"I don’t know what to do." 

"My hair is not growing."

I have a confession to make, sometimes I get frustrated with my hair as well. But here are some tips that I hope will help you get through those frustrating moments:

1.)  Keep inspired. Look at pictures of natural heads and admire their locks. Remind yourself that if you exercise a little bit of patience then you too could have fly hair just like hers. I also like to look at pictures of natural haired ladies for inspiration. I really like Tracee Ellis Ross and I confess that sometimes I watch past episodes of Girlfriends just to  stare at her hair. Visit lecoil for inspirational photos of naturals.

2.)  Change it up. Try doing something new with your hair. I generally wear twists almost all the time. I once told a friend that I hope  twists will become my trademark style eventually and she replied: “Are you kidding me? They already are!” But sometimes I get soo bored with my hair that I have to try something different. Try going on youtube to find a hair tutorial you can do by yourself.

3.)  No two fingers are equal. So as a rule ditch the comparism game. Stop comparing and envying other people’s curls or length or shine or, or, or. Instead practice contentment. It will do more for you. Thank God you have a head of hair and it is growing.  Re-examine your expectations. If when you first went natural you believed that your hair would look like person B's hair and you realize that it doesn’t, then this is the time for you to accept what your hair can and will do and live with it.

4.)  Be patient. You hair will grow just take it easy.

5.)  Commit to finding out what works for you and your hair. Don’t spend hours trying to imitate the hair regimen of somebody whose texture is not close to yours. Instead focus on finding out what works for you.

6.)  Read some blogs, learn something new, try a new hair spray recipe, deep conditioning treatment e.t.c. And if reading blogs and viewing others fotki albums causes you anxiety over your hair then stay off them for a while. Relax instead and purge yourself of the anxiety.

7.)  Have a spa day and invite some girlfriends over. Do each other's hair as you watch a movie. Do a facial, manicures and pedicures. You know, just pamper yourselves.


Moni said...

Finding hair models with hair similar to mine is a real inspiration. People with hair like Tracee or Corinne Bailey Rae have never been my hair models (though I think that they have beautiful hair) because my hair is nothing like theirs. Instead, I look to Algebra Blessett, Nadia Turner, and Ayo. I also love sites like lecoil, fotki and youtube, which show real people providing accessible inspiration. Seeing a variety of beautiful natural styles that I can actually attain helps me to further appreciate the beauty of my own hair (appreciating what it can do, instead of what it can't) and also gives me ideas on how to style my hair (as I also get stuck in the twists rut sometimes).

Abi Idowu said...

When I decided to go natural and grow dreads, most people I knew said I was either mad or i would look dirty, or invite evil spirits etc etc, but i stuck to my guns and kept at it, at a point, I even experimented with colours till I was satisfied that black was the right thing for me, now people stop me to ask about my hair, men want to run their fingers through it ( I let the really buff ones do)
It took me 2 years to grow it to a presentable lenght, but I stuck with it. Hope this helps someone

PreciousOne AngelEyes said...

thanks! this is what i needed to read for inspiration, natural hair can be so frustrating at times :(

Omozo said...

Very nice tips. I agree especially with the tip encouraging us to "change it up" afterall, variety, they say, is the spice of life.